DEAD

Dead

By: Tyler Ross

Hours spent and days spent fixed upon new ideas. I’ve been going through the motions reality checking myself, which seems to stream my deepest emotions. After activities, I’ve become more lethargic than ever. Can’t live in the past they say, but how do you help these days? When everything to distract you washes away like the oceans tide. These thoughts seem to stay. At the moment, not one of my passions shines like the sunrays spreading warmth over my world. Momentarily, I believe they will come, but whom am I kidding. I live in L.A.! Home to a place where my peers have to act a certain way. Where they cascade around ditching their priorities or sticking to empty promises and numerous ways to ante up their status. How do you find true friendship, when every breath of fresh air is robbed by falsity? I remember the days when I had a best friend, where I wasn’t stuck in the in-between as the middleman or the forgotten. You may read me and see I’m jaded, exposing myself well to the bone. You only reap what you’re shown. Say I’m rotten for my sidelined and experienced observations. I’m a logical creation. A life product, but I’m not becoming a part of this environment. I’m stating an early retirement. Dead! Dead! An early death for this defeated man. I’m no longer optimistic living in such a surrounded wasteful land. My goals will stay. My smile will fade. My drive will increase to escape and leave behind these fucks that create this disgrace on my face. Where are the real people? The loyalty I’ve read in books. Why am I the one robbed from having what they have? A close connection is all it took. All these individuals have yet to invest their time being my friend, as the efforts I have put forth to achieve. Did I stick around, while they planted their selfish seed? No! They would rather dick me around and use me for all their needs. Didn’t make me want to hang around. So I let go. I’m running away. So long to the old me. A new man I will generate today. This man will be more aggressive. This man won’t take any more of their shit. Death to myself I say for not seeing any real promise and the decay of my own mental health. Although I’m truly alone and admit, I’d rather stay alone, instead of spending my time swimming in their cesspools of shit. Dead! Dead! Friends till the end. Still trying to defend the existence of a real friend. Dead! Dead!